Getting back to the basics
Many are familiar with Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Most of us swing wildly between grandiose ideas of self-actualization and financial or relationship setbacks that make us doubt we’ll ever “arrive.”
This primer: Making Money is not a Sin: How I went from being a stay at home mom of 8 to making a 6-figure income deals with the lower two levels of Maslow’s Pyramid and is only part of my story.
This free guide to financial independence teaches you to meet your basic needs referred to as physiological and safety needs.
On my journey to financial independence, I had to grapple with tangible factors that made me feel unsafe and insecure. I worried about not having enough to eat, what my children would wear to school, and plumbing problems at home.
I used prayer, surrender, seeking, planning, and learning to reach career and financial success I dreamed of as a child.
Financial Security or Love and Belonging?
For a long time, I wanted to completely ignore the reality of my need for financial safety and security. I was in denial and said crazy things like, “Love is enough.” My stubbornness even led me to despise anyone who believed financial security was more important than love and belonging.
I guess somewhere deep inside, I did want financial security and I dreamed of success. But I believed that if I had a sense of love and belonging, everything else would fall into place.
I was wrong.
I’m not 100% certain why I had these primal needs slightly out of balance in my life. Maybe it’s because I always felt financially safe and secure growing up.
As a child, I watched my father, “the man of the house,” go to work every day.
So, I never considered that as a female, I could be responsible for my family’s financial needs.
Here’s why.
Financial Fairy Tales
My mother worked in the home. I never internalized the impact a woman might have on the family budget. I couldn’t easily visualize bringing in my own income while also taking care of my children and spouse.
I’d also watched and read plenty of fairy tales where money just happens in the background.
The princess is always rescued by a prince who provides her a sense of love and belonging.
I never thought that the prince needed a day job to pay for the diamonds and roses. I also did not consider the full financial weight of having a family and providing for their basic needs.
I didn’t expect to be taken care of while sitting on the couch eating bon-bons. I always worked hard and contributed to family finances and also bore the physical burden of caring for the household.
But maybe I believed deep down that the real financial burden was someone else’s to bear.
It was difficult to stop fixating on the “love and belonging” level of Maslow’s Pyramid.
But I could no longer ignore the importance of building a foundation of financial security.
However, my newfound appreciation for money, is not because I believe money is the only currency.
Money will always leave some debts unpaid.
Love, the Intangible Currency
I had an intangible struggle with not having a strong sense of love and belonging, the third level of Maslow’s hierarchy.
Love, though often intangible, will always balance the books despite there being no balance sheet where love is concerned.
Take all of your love experiences in life and add them up.
You will still find it hard to quantify love’s intangible effect on your bottom line of happiness.
But just because you can’t calculate love, doesn’t mean you should eliminate love from the equation. Quite the contrary, because no matter what we do in life, living without love is just a bunch of noise. (paraphrased from Bible)
Maslow had something right when he recognized our fluid intrinsic needs for very different things at different stages in life.
About Anna Esther
LoveLifeLinks.com believes you can find financial security and a strong sense of love and belonging.
Remember, you can feel love anywhere. Anytime. All the time.
